It’s the first day of D.A.T.E.

Finally, I have reach the first goal: publish on a top conference, get a foothole in the academic world. But I don’t really feel it, care it. May be its because it’s not an area I interest, or is the journey of making it make me happy. I am not even remotely prode of this work.

But the feelings of so many memory, about europe, about the struggle I held during my first year of mater student. The feeling of seperationg, missunderstaning, the regret of not saying what I want to say.

Now, sitting in the noisy but lonely champer of the DATE. It’s kind like NIPS, that you are not really fit into the community. I mean the food is nice and the drinks are definetly a plus. But if you can’t communicate your work to everyone, that is really a shame. It kinda break the hole purpose of attending an academic conference.

Later today, I will get on the flixbus, to get back to munich. So long, too long. I remenber the last time visit munich, it is so clear like it is still yesterday. Missing the jounery to the lake, swiming in it, almost drowning in it, hhh. hiking on it. Drink way too much bear, like few L of a day much. The gardon, the museum, the park. Everyhing is great and happy. It really is a stressless time of my life. Feelling loved and needed.

Constast to today, I am pretty much on my own. With much of the pressure from the academic world and the desire to push myself to the limit. It is really kind funny how I end up here. With a empty skill set, much of the suffering, and all the fun and what a journey. Hey, that is what I call a fresh start!

The time of crazyness has gone with my youth, sort of. Also I am not a diasnore, but I am not no longger young, not even by EU standed hhh. Next year, I will not be able to get discount ticket in touriesty places. Kinda growth up, stronger smarter braver.